Part 1 of Day 2 in Jamaica started with the sunlight peaking through the curtains of my luxury Motel 6 hotel room. I was awaken by the sounds of Franklin and Teddy’s snoring who had been put all night whoring. While I in the other hand was a good Christian man who stayed in his room talking to the lordt. I had contemplated on killing them in their sleep for booking this dreadful caravansary (that means a place where one pays for lodging and sh*t.) But alas, they had informed me that because of their meager efforts to secure adequate lodging for one such as I. That they would be paying for our first excursion therefore by default, they shall be allowed to live this once.
Anyhow we got cleaned up and headed to breakfast by the pool. It seems that this was the only place at the resort that served breakfast. The atmosphere around us felt light and it was sunny. The scent of the ocean was faint and crisp with a hint of salt. The skies were clear as we watched how they reflected their purity off the oceans surface. We maneuvered through a beautiful sea of greenery and white stones that laid all around us. As we walked the side walks to feast, we were accompanied by the distant sounds of the carribean version of Beyoncé, “Dangerously in Love!” playing all around us. (I was secretly singing it in my head but I couldn’t let the fellas know that. I’m talking i had hand motions to run my notes, ugly face and all that do you hear me!? I’m talking Fantasia type singing 😂)
The breakfast was buffet style so it was nothing really spectacular. Just the regular bacon, fresh fruit, mimosas you know, stuff like that. However, they did have chicken gizzards and rice so that was different. After breakfast we decided to go canoeing but there was a yellow flag waring so we had to wait. So, we decided to go get some drinks. On our way back the bar, we met some white folks that was look-a-whoing at us. So I said to them, “what’s up cuzz? Yall must was looking for us?” The white woman…, of course the white woman was the bold one and said, “Yes, cousin where were you all morning?” Now this raggedy bit*h, had been watching me since breakfast so I know that she knew exactly were i was. But I didn’t say that, I said, “I was looking for y’all trying to get a drink!” And then the husband got excited and said, “Hey cousin, I got you one right here!” So we sat and drink with the white people for a while and chilled by the pool watching these men in green jump suits walk around with machetes. 😳
Franklin’s negro-senses we’re on high alert because these guys were walking damn near in slow motion. An we aint never seen no shiggdity like this. I’m talking they were Ieaned back into the wind and everything. So Franklin asked me as if I knew, “Aye man, why are they walking around with those machetes?” I just said, “n*gga, I don’t know. They’re probably killing snakes or cutting down coconuts. But, look at Teddy ass.” Teddy, we over there smiling and laughing with the white folks. He’s didn’t have a clue that they was about to kidnap his lol black ass and touch all over his privates.
So we sat around the pool bar until lunchtime just people watching. We did that until we see this dude under a Pavillion jump on the girl and stared grilling this damn jerked chicken. Now I don’t know what he put in it or on it but that muthafucka had the talent of the gawds in his finger tips. That chicken was so got damn good that I went back for seconds.